My favorite part of the movie Secondhand Lions is the part where the main character, Walter, goes to a restaurant with his uncles, Hub and Garth. Some young, punk teenagers come into the restaurant thinking that they can do whatever they want and start messing with the old men. What they don’t know is that Hub was trained in the French foreign legions and can kick there butts with his eyes closed.
The punk kids pull a benchmade griptilian knife on Hub, thinking that they are going to hurt the old man. He turns the benchmade griptilian knife back on them in two seconds, pulling it away from them. He’s confident in his abilities, so he throws the knife back at them, and tells them to try again. The punk kid does, but still gets taken down by just Uncle Hub. In fact, all four or five of the teenagers get taken down by just Uncle Hub. It’s a terrific scene.
The point of all this is that it doesn’t matter what weapons you have if you don’t know how to use them. Only the combination of knowledge plus weapons will save you. But please, use your benchmade griptilian knives for good.
There are people who lend money for a living and then there are people who ruin their living by lending money. You might call what this second group of people do “private lending” but most institutions wouldn’t recognize that definition. Most would just call that poor decision making and I’d be forced to concur.
Loaning money to a friend or associate should be considered giving money away, because they never pay it back. Never. In my experience that money just disappears into thin air and then those people will just act like you never did anything for them. I’m not bitter, I’m just speaking from observation. That’s why I’m not planning on lending anyone money any time soon. When I’m rich I can do that but until then it’s not going to happen.
So, lets talk about how long till I’m rich…it’s going to be a while. Let’s talk about what I’m going to do when I’m rich:
1. I’m going to get a track car. Like an Atom, or a Lotus Elise, or more ideally a Cayman that has been modded to be a bit more track worthy, or even more ideally a 911 GT3 RS.
2. I’m going to get a house and not put anything in it besides a piano and a couch a bed and a TV. It’ll be great.
That’s all I’m going to do. Then I’ll be happy.
A pool fence in Riverside California could be necessary if you believe all the rumors. What rumors you ask? A lot of stray cats? That’s the one I’m thinking of but the truth is the people I knew weren’t very fond of Riverside and never had a really good reason so I think that could just be made up.
At the same time, if you are going to have a pool you probably want to keep things out of it one way or another. Whatever you need to do to keep things out of your pool, you should probably do. If that means a fence, get a fence. If that means a pool cover, get a pool cover. If that means automated laser shooting guns, then get automated laser shooting guns. You have to do whatever you have to do.
The main thing with pools is that you keep them in order. When you don’t instead of being awesome your pool becomes an eyesore. It’s a terrible thing to do. Particularly if you don’t empty it, cause then you develop a swamp, and having a swamp in your back yard is a bad idea. No one ever says, “Man, I wish we could afford a swamp.” So clean your pool already. And keep it that way.
Posted in Home
Tagged CA, pool, riverside
Remember the day you realized that you weren’t going to actually become an astronaut? Or a firefighter? No? Perhaps you were the kid sitting really close to the hamster cage who actually did become a veterinarian. Congratulations on achieving your mediocre childhood dreams. For me, it was a comedian. I almost made it, too. Check it out: Two lawyers walked into a bar in Los Angeles… And the bartender says…. no.
Wait. Was it the lawyers who said..?
Never mind. I was nowhere close to reaching my dreams.
It’s amusing to me to think that hardly anyone says they want to be a lawyer when they grow up. And yet, there are SO MANY lawyers out there. What’s worse is how difficult it is to find a good one, or at least one you can trust. I should know. Do you know how hard it is to trademark your own name? I don’t. Does anyone know of a good trademark lawyer out there? Let me know.
I wonder if any of these attorneys wish they would have dropped out of law school and gone to space camp after all. I’m not going to lie, I kind of wish I had.
Confession number 1,395: I want to be thin. I have spent my entire life believing that I was super fat and wishing that I was thin. I think I might have been thin at one point, when I was in junior high and I was running for track nearly every day. I was kind of thin then. But even then, I didn’t believe that I was thin.
I look at women that can seemingly eat whatever they want and remain their same skinny size 4 and I wonder how they do it. Were they just blessed with a wonderful metabolism? Was I cursed by my father’s mother’s mother’s genes? Can I get out of this trend without having to eat only salad for the rest of my life?
I’ve had many failed fake diet attempts. I don’t want to go on a real diet because with most of them, as soon as you stop the ‘dieting’ you gain all that weight back and then some. I have tried eating better and I’m good at eating fruits and vegetables. But somehow, I can’t resist a jelly-filled donut. It’s sad.
It’s really too bad, but I’m too much of a wuss to go to hcg injections. I know that it can be dangerous, but hcg injections are a proven weight loss method. Instant results!
Like I said, though, I’m too much of a wuss.
…or else they will turn into snotty little brats like the rest of the video game generation that can beat an infinite amount of levels on any given game but they can’t multiply by 11. A lot of parents these days are so tied up with their facebooking and their gaming or whatever else that aren’t teaching children values. If you are one of these parents, then you are the problem. You can’t expect kids to just teach themselves these kinds of things or just figure life out for themselves. Do people realize the responsibility that they are taking on when they decide that they are going to have a child? It seems like a lot of parents deal with kids like they would deal with a puppy or a kitten. They think that they are absolutely adorable when they are really little and they play with them a lot, because they get enjoyment out of it. What do people usually once a puppy gets older and becomes a smelly, dirty dog that is roaming the neighborhood? They forget about it. It’s a burden to take care of and they stop caring what the dog does as long as it isn’t bothering them. Bottom line?… don’t raise your kids like a pet.
Posted in Family
Tagged kids, pets
Congratulations! You have just bought your first copper cookware set. I must admit that I am a slight bit jealous. I would like my own set. But back to YOUR copper pots and pans. The next question is: What are you going to make first in your new copper cookware set? You need to make something tasty, hopefully for dinner. Here, let me help.
Take at least two thawed chicken breasts, preferably boneless. I like boneless because I don’t want to have to pick out the bones later, but that is just my preference. Put your chicken breasts into your copper pan. Next, in a separate bowl, empty a can of cream of mushroom soup and add about a third of a can of water to it. Mix until it is an even consistency. Then take the cream of mushroom soup and pour it into the copper pan with your chicken breasts. Cook on a medium flame on the stove top until the chicken is done, which is approximately twenty minutes. Definitely take the temperature of the chicken before you take it of the heat. You can add onions, salt and pepper to this if you want. I like to serve it with a side of rice and peas. But it’s your call.
Now eat and enjoy your first meal from your copper pots and pans.
I have a couple of questions about “natural” products. If anyone can answer these for me, I would really be appreciative.
1)Does putting the word “Natural” in the name of the product instantly make it better? There are a lot of products out there that have the word “natural” in their name and because they do, I believe that they are better for me. I mean really, I would totally want to use ”natural hair care products” over “synthetically made hair care products”. It just makes good sense.
2)What does it take for a product to be considered “natural”? I mean, to be truly natural, you would have to run out into the field (or forest or wherever) and grab the plant and rub it on your head. Doing anything more, really, is unnatural. Even rubbing plants on your head seems fairly unnatural, though. So really, the only natural thing is picking it straight from the source.
3) In the term, “natural hair care products“, are the hair care products natural, or are they trying to make your hair look natural? I guess we really want both, don’t we?
I am just curious on all this stuff. The sooner you can get back to me on it, the better.
One thing that I found out when I got married is that being a woman who looks acceptable costs a freaking heck of a lot more than being a man who looks acceptable. From the Instyler Rotating Iron to those Happy Hair things that girls put under their hair to make it look big, there are trillions of products out there for women to buy in an attempt to look good, by their own standards. As a guy I buy a think of shampoo+conditioner for about 3 bucks every couple of months, a stick of deoderant for 2 dollars every month, and about one bar of soap every three weeks that costs about 50 cents. I spent 16 dollars on a beard trimmer that I use about once a week. All of that adds up to a tiny fraction of what my wife spends. Just her foundation make-up that she buys every couple of months costs 12 bucks. She uses shampoo and conditioner at about three times the rate that I do. And then there’s haircuts. I get mine cut for free. She spends 55 bucks to get hers cut and colored every two months. She tells me that’s a lot less than what other girls spend on that. Just one reason why I could never be a polygamist.
Have you ever wondered what business birthday cards should look like? No? You should, because while asking how old someone is illegal, asking when their birthday generally isn’t. So you can give a birthday card to a business affiliate it just may make things a little awkward if he didn’t give you a birthday card. See how that works?
It is funny how different people interact differently at work. I personally am a bit more removed. Less personal. I don’t think work is about being personal although it certainly is an important part of it to a degree, but when it boils down to it I’ve found that keeping professional life separate from my personal life can make things easier to manage. All the distractions that can happen by making work personal can be…very distracting. I don’t like that. Some people on the other hand are very good at balancing that social aspect. Not my strength. I’m good at focusing on one thing and then never stopping it. Not exactly the dynamic multi-tasking that some people seek for.
In the end I think it is important to work closely with those you work with. Keep things personal, but professional, so think twice about that card you’re looking at…